breaking the routine

Gaya ng nakagawian, lumibot lang tayo sa mall na parang mga tanga... Tamang ikot lang.

Tapos dinner. Usap onti.

At dahil ayaw nating mabato pareho sa bahay namin ay nanuod na lang tayo ng sine. Wala na akong gustong panuodin liban sa X-men na napanood mo naman na. Inulit mo na lang din dahil ang sabi mo gusto mo at tutal maganda. Ilang beses naman kitang ginising sa paghihilik sa sinehan. Ako nga 'tong dalawang oras pa lang an tulog.

Ganyan tayo more or less sa bawat Sabado na tayo ay nagkikita. Pero kahapon talaga nasa rurok na ako ng kabagutan. Alam ko ganun ka din. Kahit hindi mo sabihin I know I am boring you. Parehas naman kasi tayo hindi madaldal.

At least I managed to break the routine. In bed. It took a lot of effort on my part...

Hindi kita kinulit bago tayo matulog. Ni hindi kita hinipuan buong magdamag para magbigay motibo. Bumangon na lang din ako nung sinabi mo na uuwi ka na.

This time I didn't suck you and swallow your juice.  I didn't jack off while you caress my nipples and watch me cum.

At least somehow we had a break of what could pass as lovemaking.

no complaints

There was once an office mate of mine who I never heard utter a single complain on any of his calls. He never even rant about the additional tasks he was given nor whine about how some co-workers abused that good nature of his.

You know how we agents love the mute button on the avaya so we can just simply hit it whenever we feel like saying expletives to a difficult caller. On the months that I was seated beside him I tried to emulate him- out of admiration and embarrassment. That was every single shift but every night was a failure. The most I could do was to minimize the curses I mutter while on mute and just give the avaya the dirty finger.

By the time he was asked to take escalation calls he managed to retain that same cool composure. Sometimes I could tell how one irate caller was being unreasonable and just giving him a hard time. He had never banged his mouse though nor stand up to deal with frustrations. At the end of those type of calls he would just simply continue whatever he was doing prior. The most he would do (and this was only when he asked how it went) was that he would smile it off with a shake of his head. Yes just one shake and that was it.

It was more than a year now when he left for another job. From what I have heard, it was a good move for him because it is more related to whatever he took in college. I don't see him much in my news feed in Facebook except for those occasions his wife (a former office mate also) tagged him on their pictures. He has one peculiar habit though on that site and it happens every few months or so. On those rare days he would simply flood it with posts of movie posters, those presumably he have seen, matching it with most notable line from each and every flick. We are talking about thirty or so movie here. Those are the only type of shout outs he has.

I had never asked how he managed to retain that kind of coolness. That kind of attitude was surprising of course but not totally impossible. So what I did was I simply embraced the idea that perhaps with practice and conscious effort I could do the same. But as you may know I should have really asked him before he resigned.

All that is left for me to do now is to wonder. Maybe he's just one of a kind. A natural. Maybe he's just being true to his name. He's Angel.

on writing

Halos tapos na ang kalahati ng taon. And to borrow my office mate's litany, “wala pa din akong achievement sa buhay”. He used to say that a lot and we just laugh about it. Kasi naman madalas sasabihin nya ito out of the blue maisingit lang ba (“ Wala pa ding reply yung isang department sa e-mail ko. Two weeks ago na yun. Anong petsa na? Tapos wala pa din akong achievement sa buhay.) I haven't talked to him that much na nga since I stopped smoking. Sa yosi breaks lang naman kasi kami nakakapag-chikahan na walang ibang eepal. Lol.

So yun na nga ilang kembot na lang July na. And my gulay I just posted two entries for this blog-blogan of mine. Tamad ko noh. Even my journal na naka-save sa PC eh bungal-bungal din. May mga times na aaraw-arawin ko magsulat minsan naman mga ilang linggong hindi ko talaga ito bubuksan.

I haven't disclosed (yet) my identity on this site thinking that it would give me freedom to write whatever crazy thoughts I have. Hind rin eh. Wala naman kasi masyadong ganap sa buhay ko and I am afraid that if just narrate in details the mundane life I have, I might regret it badly in the future. Alam mo yun feeling na cringe galore ka kasi ang chaka na nga ng storlyine, mas chaka lalo how you wrote about it. May mga ilang posts kaya ako na dinelete ko lol. Sana wala pa talaga nakabasa kasi it so yuck talaga haha.

What about fictional achuchuchu ganyan? O sige maybe in the future. Mas mahirap 'ata yun ha kasi dapat my command ka talaga sa written language. Eh ako I would like to think of myself that I can tell the difference between what is literature and what is plain trash. Taray. Boplaks nga lang me magsulat.

Way back in high school, there was this workbook called Write to Express Not to Impress. Award! You know what they say about writing: you have to do it daily five hundred words a minimum so it would be part of your system. I did that for a couple of days you know just writing about anything without thinking much of the grammar and all. It is a good practice huh but the downside of it is that at times you would realize you've got to stop. That is because you start noticing that you sound like those annoying talkative people in your office. Or those friends you have in Facebook na wagas makapag-shoutout nang kung anik-anik. Hindi man lang ba pinag-isipan.

So ayan siguro naman simula ngayon sisipagin na akong magpost. Hindi ko naman kailangan ng madaming makakabasa ng kung ano mang kababawan, kabalbalan at kabaliwan mayroon ang blog na ito. Susme the thought of someone, even just someone, reading what I have written gives me the shivers. Charot.